Pick Me Up

oil

2009-12-12T15:20:00.000-08:00

It's Chanukkah. I've been planning my latke approach for a few weeks now, so the results are extra special. "Regular" potato with dill and fresh parsley; Curry sweet potato with leeks; and chipotle beet.

Fun to make.

full

2009-11-19T00:18:00.000-08:00

I feel like such a grown-up - the best part of my day today was after work.

- Bought some great new kicks. A little off-message, but I'm still juiced to rock em.
- Sang great music with the PEBCC alumni choir in preparation for two concerts in early December.
- Caught the encore set of the Ray Ray show at the Fox (couldn't hear anything, but he looked great). No ticket required, apparently.

But most exciting, walked past our NEW TICKET WINDOW! Soon to be up and running... get ready!

roller skates

2009-11-10T20:11:00.000-08:00

As a kid, roller skates were a means of transportation in the neighborhood. Recently, they've joined a league of their own. One of my favorite pasttimes more recently was "club games" - coming up with ways to entertain myself and my loved ones at the expense of not-so-innocent party-goers around town.

One favorite is "Roller Skates". Participants earn points by identifying the fastest rollers in the crowd and convincing her to trade (her ridiculous) shoes with you(r much more comfortable ones). It's a hard game.

I became very curious about roller skates - where to buy them, etc. - so I've been on a hunt. Here are my spoils:

littles

2009-11-04T23:20:00.000-08:00

little people: mini-futbolistas at la escuelita next to my office
little wins: no fights at the front office coordination meeting
little snacks: small apples in the field trip focus group
little truths: musical differences between oakland and frisco, soul

it's the little things...

mixed

2009-11-03T23:43:00.000-08:00

Most of the time, I need stuff that can help me keep my head high above the pain and heartache that fill my days. Sometimes, though, there's so much going on that even the strongest pick-me-ups can't lift me high enough and the illusion gets shaky. Today was one of those days. I will continue to be sad and terrified by how easy it is for adults to demonstrate their disrespect for young people by stripping out all of the supports that make it even halfway bearable to navigate through changing expectations and real decisions. I want to believe that I can impact that. I want to continue to shift those priorities. I want my future generations to have a foundation to continue this work for their future generations. I want to win.

Sometimes, though, I can get swept up in the fervor and turmoil and forget the values that ground me in this work. I can get panicky and careless. I can act outside of myself and forget.

I am grateful for the small number of people who can see that happening in me and know how to get through my brambles to stay close to me and remind me of what I already know in the different ways I need to hear it. More than any pick-me-up, I get so much from those who know how to hold me down.

skin

2009-11-01T21:21:00.000-08:00

Crazy hard week last week made me make an appointment at the Korean spa in SF. When Jess, Tracey, and I tried its LA-counterpart last spring, I didn't know what to expect and my life was changed forever. The SF version is closer, and maybe a little cleaner, and I couldn't pick a better place to shed a lot of emotional and physical skin right now.

After a spontaneous nap, I had pupusas and brave conversation at a spot in West Oakland I'd never tried before and will go to again next time the bridge is broken and I have a fried cheese craving.

Watch out this week, if I see you, I might make you touch me.

stress + music = supergreat

2009-10-27T22:06:00.000-07:00

Spent this morning at an early meeting where we presented our budget woes to the OUSD Principals - how would YOU cut $28 million from a budget of $252 million?

Spent more of the morning helping with some tedious details at a deep east middle school - and busted two girls cutting school on pajama day.

Spent the afternoon helping with some tedious details at a shrinking elementary school - found some small space to laugh.

THEN, got a surprise gift from one of my favorite colleagues - the newest Cecilia Bartoli CDs PLUS the accompanying 100-page castrato dictionary!! Opera nerd SCORE!

THEN, I didn't get stuck on the Bay Bridge. Again. Scary.

neighborhood excitement

2009-10-25T21:58:00.000-07:00

A mysterious event happened across the street this morning. I was completely puzzled, until these two finally emerged from the apartment (red umbrella for luck and protection), off to celebrate their lives together.

Maybe I'll still find that Chinese quincenera someday...

ladies

2009-10-24T22:58:00.000-07:00

I don't think I've laughed that much in such a short period of time. And ate and drank well too.

challah + me'shell

2009-10-23T23:37:00.000-07:00

Friday night fun: shabbos dinner with one of my favorite families plus a mind-blowing show by one of my favorite musicians... plus homemade challah and the continuing success of The New Parish.

Killer.

success!

2009-10-22T21:54:00.001-07:00

Tonight, we celebrated the 3rd annual Oakland Unified School District Expect Success awards. I was honored to be in the room with so many incredible people, committed to the daily success of Oakland students and families.

From our small corner of the district, Operations Support was pleased to honor Linda for her hard work and passion for what's right for kids.

Onward!!

oakland nature

2009-10-19T22:08:00.000-07:00

Busy day (mostly in my car). It's fall.

And we have rainbows.

special time

2009-10-12T22:05:00.001-07:00

I'm pretty transparent about my love for Isaiah. We've been special friends for about three years now and I only hope that I get to be his buddy for a long long time to come.

Tonight, over dinner, music time, and bedtime, Isaiah:

had a Shock-G moment ("I like my oatmeal lumpy.")
sang me a song about all of his fingers ("How are you doing today? Very well I thank you.")
tried to convert me to bananas ("But we have very very delicious ones in our kitchen.")
asked attentive questions ("What is a vacation? Did you fly on a Southwest plane? Did you go to nee-ew yohk city?")
rocked out with me
read a lot of stories about how things work ("Why does a miller use a grindstone? Why are all of those pigs sleeping in the same bed?")
named and re-named all of his stuffed animals
successfully convinced his 4-month old brother that spinach in a tortilla was actually an ice cream cone
yelled things to make me laugh ("Shabbat hooray!")
left me with a cliffhanger on how pumpkins grow
willed me to sing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" in Spanish (arcoiris!). Twice.

Definitely made it easy to forget the early morning anxiety and endless work day.

lake music

2009-10-07T20:58:00.000-07:00

I woke up crazy early this morning and went for a walk around the lake. Beating the sun to the day makes me feel smart and powerful for some reason.

Besides the killer views, the soundtrack really makes the difference. Many thanks to the podcasters (etc) known as Matthew Africa and Sake One for the morning accompaniments.

mantra

2009-10-06T17:54:00.000-07:00

I had a rough September.

Thanks to Jamilah for the help with kicking off October:

True. True.

we don't eat enough curry goat

2009-09-05T21:12:00.000-07:00

Had dinner with my mom and cousin at Sweet Fingers in San Leandro. Really excited for the leftovers.

first day of school?

2009-08-31T16:20:00.000-07:00

So I know my pick-me-up for the first day of school should be something about kids, now that they are all freshly scrubbed and assigned to classes, but getting to an elementary school at 7:30am to be a first day of school partner doesn't really get things started on the right foot for me. I learned that while I am highly educated and experienced, I am not good at papering and bordering bulletin boards.

Anyway, thankfully I don't have to depend on work to pick me up. Watch what happens when one of my favorite people does one of my favorite things at one of my favorite places.

cheating

2009-08-30T08:51:00.001-07:00

I'm not sure how many times I'm allowed to use this, but it pretty much works every time.

dear chilaquiles

2009-08-26T22:39:00.001-07:00

I know better than to use food to make myself feel better. But when you put together chips and cheese and eggs and crema and chicken and onions, it's hard to see anything else as a pick-me-up. Especially after another 12 hours of work.

chug chug chug chug chug

2009-08-25T14:37:00.000-07:00

It's not the work that's getting me down, it's the volume and intensity that made me cry at my desk for a minute.

This helped. Click for more.

new zealand

2009-08-24T22:39:00.000-07:00

Started out this morning a little hyped, then got a little disappointed, then got fired up for kids, then got heart-full for popsie.

Now I'm trying to finish the two things I didn't finish today, staying focused on the kids running around in the dim light at the end of this little tunnel.

Thankfully, I have Jemaine to make everything alright. Conditions are perfect.

chickens, dads, and berries

2009-08-23T23:53:00.000-07:00

chels' dad came to the party.

and then, chels went berry-hunting. and won!!

4 things

2009-08-22T23:57:00.000-07:00

i did four things today.

Slept
Walked/Ran around the lake (special thanks to DJs who post mixtapes for me to download)
Made a pizza
Watched TV

happy happy happy happy happy

creepy good

2009-08-21T23:03:00.000-07:00

Seph and I went to see Rear Window at the Paramount. My first Hitchcock movie, my first time at the culty-fun old-movie-night-at-the-Paramount, my first time being surrounded by over 3000 people I don't know in my own town, and my first time in the high high balcony.

In other firsts, I met Jackson yesterday. He slept the whole time, but when you're 8 weeks old, you get to do that. I think I'll like him, but I can't say for sure yet. We have time.

jetting

2009-08-20T21:39:00.000-07:00

I'm going on vacation soon. 12-hour days make me tired. ATL "housewives" are crazy. An hour and a half in the car in traffic is not the best for my car. The Outkast tribute makes time go by really quickly (especially the Bombs Over Baghdad slowdown). People are testing me and my sunshine. I have a new shirt design in mind (NO STANKNESS). I'm too tired for snuggles.

updownupdownupdownupdownupdown etc.

humble + fried cheese

2009-08-19T23:52:00.001-07:00

Today at 6am, a man came and cut a square in my office carpet, in preparation for drilling a hole in the floor. Today, at 6pm, while I sat working at my desk, that same man grunted a lot while he dug a 5 foot hole through the concrete and dirt next to me. Next, another man put some white tubes in the hole in the floor and asked me not to touch them until he came back for them. Then he put a large orange cone over the white tubes, for safety. He'll be back on Friday.

In case I'd let my place on the Executive Team go to my head, this decidedly knocked me back down to earth. A little humility is good for everyone.

But then I had fried cheese in the car with Chels.

And then I picked up my mama from the airport!

Great day.

stretch

2009-08-18T23:06:00.000-07:00

A's didn't win.
Tash is NY-bound tomorrow.

BUT
I scored good parking!

I'm stretching.

best hats + DUB for the A's

2009-08-17T23:05:00.000-07:00

let's go oak-land! clap clap clap-clap-clap.

semi-suburban sunday

2009-08-16T20:09:00.001-07:00

Do your suburbs have beach?

small burgers

2009-08-14T21:43:00.000-07:00

Workweek from down below over, and Merritt has started making personal burger cakes.

old clothes + toes

2009-08-13T21:35:00.000-07:00

Day 2 of new principal training made me almost lose my fire, but not quite. Apparently when everything seems to be crashing down around me, all I need are the ratty old lounge pants I'm not allowed to wear outside anymore and red toenails.

Also, a Real Housewives of Atlanta spree helps for context.

somehow

2009-08-12T23:32:00.000-07:00

I worked a 14-hour day today, and I'm STILL fired up about Oakland schools.

fired up

2009-08-10T22:19:00.001-07:00

I spent today in the OUSD executive team retreat. I won't go into deep detail, but I am fired up about my work and what we are doing to serve children in Oakland. I feel so focused, I'm not even phased by all of the things I have to do this week.

I am grateful.

I'm also glad Ariel was born, but that's not unique to today.

semi-suburban saturday lady

2009-08-08T22:39:00.000-07:00

I had a little bit of a to-do list today.

Got everything done, mostly because of delicious brunch.

Trying not to be annoyed by the failed movie attempt, but I'll have other chances I think.

birthdays

2009-08-07T23:07:00.000-07:00

Today had many highlights, but at the top top top was celebrating the birthday of two of my favorites.

Nir, thanks for your quiet consistency, solid perspective, humor, and surprise visits.

Pedro, thanks for setting a good example and always always writing me back.

I toast you both - so glad you were born.

korexican, old friends and new

2009-08-06T22:29:00.000-07:00

I got to catch up with one of my favorite people from high school at lunch today and got a really great crash course on the product chain - so much fits in to OUSD! Anyway, thanks Presto, for the context and the humor. Come back again soon!

(I am not going to mention the pirate band I avoided at Quinn's Lighthouse after work today. Oops.)

Then, got a last-minute invite to get Korean BBQ with a new friend. Lots of jokes and meat later, I scored a parking spot a block away from my house. Yesss!

legacy

2009-08-05T22:32:00.000-07:00

Today, I'm celebrating my dad's 61st birthday.

One of the blessings that comes from living 15+ years without your father is that you get really good at guessing at what would have made him proud or happy or angry or confused or curious. You get to keep and access a strange rolodex of memories and try to apply them to new situations and relationships to piece together an idea of how he'd see the world and advise you on your path.

My dad has been on my shoulder for as long as I can remember. Today, on his birthday, I am grateful for all of the times he's protected me, steered me away from trouble, sent signs I saw, sent signs I didn't see, gave me a model to follow, and challenged me with mysteries.

One of my favorite stories about my dad (you know I have a lot) is about his relationship with music, particularly his violin. He was an amazing violinist, making girls carry his instrument home so he could practice and not sacrifice looking cool. He earned first chair in his high school symphony orchestra, just before the racist school administration dismantled the group rather than seeing a young Black man in that leadership position. He passed this untraditional love on to me, playing the Moonlight Sonata on my mom's out-of-tune upright in the living room, interspersing Tchaikovsky with "Hit The Road, Jack" and Stevie Wonder records. We wore out a Yitzak Perlman tape AND a tape of Hendrix's Star Spangled Banner on our road trip to Indianapolis when I was eight.

Today, Tash heard about a program in Baltimore that gives young string players a chance to practice and perform in the summer - Thrive City String Academy. I made a little donation, in honor of my pops and his violin.

This story isn't over. Thanks Dad. I'll keep trying to fill your skates.

great day

2009-08-03T23:59:00.000-07:00

Alex (fancy red soccer shoes) and I walked over to Lakefest and checked out the booths, snacks, drinks, and music. Then we were joined by Tash, Chels, and Kari, then Adrionna, and later, one of the summer interns in my office next door. After some great music from Kev Choice and Pep Love, we headed east to Fruitvale Chicken (not the right name) for the best chickens and karaoke en espanol. Full and happy, we headed over to Somar for some MAJOR fun, and somehow managed to get home in time to go to work the next day. Oh, and I didn't order the camarones de momia - couldn't make it feel right.

sunshine and farmers

2009-07-25T21:38:00.000-07:00

There are lots of nice things about Oakland. There are lots of nice things about summer. One of the best things about Oakland in the summer is that there are delicious fruits and vegetables everywhere and that it's socially acceptable to enjoy a cold adult beverage in the middle of the day.

Easy Lounge is not really a place I like to hang out (too many negative points on the music, frequent fliers, and smokers scales), but on Saturday afternoons, they pull together three drinks based on what was good and fresh at the neighboring farmers' market. Some days are better than others, but these were particularly successful.

Add in buddies (Tash and Alex) and it's a win all around.

sasha fierce

2009-07-11T10:02:00.000-07:00

She flies through the air:

And apparently loves Jamaica:

Other highlights: wedding dress, wind, leopard print metal costumes, pretty dancer mens, and the hits. Thanks, B.

neighbor + korea

2009-07-10T08:19:00.001-07:00

I haven't had second dinner in a really really long time, but when your neighbor says he's got the line on korean fried chicken, you don't really have a lot of options. What I didn't know was that there would be korean conch salad (YUM), two kinds of fried chicken, AND a huge plastic bottle of beer. Score one for the koreans and another one for the vecino.

laughing buddies

2009-07-09T09:16:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I have no words. Sometimes it's because I can't breathe from laughing too hard. Thanks Chels - for the cheese, the dance moves, the stories, the shyness, etc.

charges

2009-07-07T00:20:00.000-07:00

I had the honor to meet several of the SF8 before they were the SF8. I am grateful for the work they have done for our community - 30 years ago and recently - and for the inspiration their continued legacy provides for young people and older young people in the movement.

Today, all charges against most of them were dropped. There is a lot to celebrate. However, the spotlight on state-sponsored torture and abuse of the legal system continues everywhere. That doesn't sound like a pick-me-up, I know.

Watch this, and learn about what you can do to stop this extra-legal activity.

Also, welcome to the CIA, FBI, DHS, NSA, and whatever other "security" agencies have now decided to follow my postings. I'll try to keep you entertained.

nicest guy in town

2009-07-02T12:13:00.000-07:00

When I worked in the west bay, I would make it a point to walk three blocks on the hardest days for pretty much the best thing baking in the neighborhood - brioche bread pudding with seasonal fruit at Tartine. It was always sad when I'd stand in line for twenty minutes and then peek over the top of the bread pudding flat and see the bread pudding covered in devil fruit. The walk back to the office could not have been longer.

Now that my life is so easy-bay-centric, my favorite special treat is one of those memories that always puts a smile on my face and a rumble in my stomach, definitely worthy of the special trip I never manage to find time to take.

Enter the nicest guy in town. Thanks to SF's favorite lots-of-things, my mid-morning work headache is the furthest thing from my mind and the demands of the afternoon are nothing I can't handle. This still-warm special delivery features raspberries and nectarines (aka winner fruits) and the side of Jew-cookies should last me right up to Pesach next year (okay, probably not).

Thank you, Stefan, you have earned yourself magic jew medicine for life.

incredible

2009-07-01T11:26:00.001-07:00

Today isn't half over yet, but I can't imagine anything else will be able to pick me up higher than this.

Welcome Tony Smith to OUSD!!

finally

2009-06-30T22:10:00.001-07:00

So June has been all about searching for a perfect new apartment, packing up four years + of stuff I need and stuff I don't need, moving it (special thanks to buddies Alex, Seph, Tash, Marty, and Kasha for carrying things down and up stairs), and now living in an apartment that fits me and slowly pulling my present and future out of boxes.

I'm leaving a lot behind on Magnolia - lots of physical stuff, heartache, laughter with people I don't know anymore, and a ton of emotional baggage. I'm feeling light and free and open to possibilities in the new neighborhood.

Goodbye Magnolia. Thanks for holding me so well for so long.

new homey

2009-06-29T21:14:00.000-07:00

I met this guy out at my dad's park. He was shy, even though I was really nice.

last day of school (for teachers)

2009-06-12T21:05:00.000-07:00

most beautiful place, with buddies, and a pops lookout.

fancy jewelry and advice:

yums

2009-06-09T21:17:00.000-07:00

Basically, it doesn't get much better than this.

bringing it

2009-05-31T03:18:00.000-07:00

Some people bring their "A game" to the club. I brought my aleph game. It didn't yield what most people expect bringing game to the club to yield, but it was fun.

at least there are no mice

2009-05-21T07:40:00.000-07:00

Late night, early morning fog (in my brain, to match the common bay area weather forecast) got shaken up this morning. It's been awhile since I resorted to "at least..." when trying to find the joy, but today is special.

Even though I'm overwhelmed with work and no-love and all that, at least there are no mice in my house and no mouse droppings next to my pillow.

Thank you to Oakland-bound Tash for the early morning perspective. No fog! All clear!

snaps

2009-05-10T21:32:00.001-07:00

Okay okay, I slacked on this. Don't worry, I also slacked on doing things that make me happy - I haven't been running around doing great things and not sharing them. Today's highlight is this:

animals

2009-04-21T20:40:00.001-07:00

I like em!

snacks

2009-04-18T09:10:00.001-07:00

nothing like vacation for good eats - best mofongo ever, pre-pesach challah grilled cheeses with tomato and bacon, sunday brunch, plus a variety of homemade yummies... surprisingly, i still fit into my clothes.

buddies, part 2

2009-04-15T18:14:00.001-07:00

I've been reflecting about how tricky it has been to come back from my vacation. If vacation had been 9 days of sitting on the beach, it would have been almost easier to come back to my real life of running around and keeping to a busy schedule. But this vacation was pretty much a glimpse at what life could be like if I didn't have someone else's schedule to keep to. Could my real life really be full of catching up with my folks, riding the subway/bus/train to delicious drinks and homemade snacks and fancy half-price sushi? It could. But it's not. But it could...

Anyway, my lingering vacation energy is linked back to these sweet faces (and a few others I didn't catch on digi-film). To Ari, Tashi, SJB, Susa, Chanthip, Nickedy, Lanuz, Bryan, Kari, Cesar, Johnny and Tiffany, Norsie, Stosh, Ped, and Ernie - thanks for the reminders! Love love love.

bedtime twins

2009-04-14T22:03:00.000-07:00

Vacation was great. More highlights to come, but this special request needed to be granted. Basically, it's important to look your best for slumber parties. Basically.

crabs, appalachia, bubbles, and pants.

2009-03-30T16:05:00.000-07:00

Friday, I spent some time with these guys.

And Saturday with this guy.

And Sunday with these guys.

All good times, but nothing as exciting as my growing pile of clothes that don't fit.

celebration walk

2009-03-27T20:52:00.000-07:00

Today, at PLACE@Prescott, an amazing little school in West Oakland, the entire student body took a Celebration Walk around their campus. The kindergarten students held little flags they colored with the UFW symbol. Older students carried posters they made and essays they wrote about farmworkers and grapes and freedom. All of the students chanted "Yes We Can" and "Si Se Puede". This Friday afternoon activity was the culmination of a week of study to honor the memory and legacy of two important leaders born in this season - Marcus A. Foster and Cesar Chavez. It was an honor to cheer on these eager scholars as they continue the work of our ancestors.

I took a made-it-through-another-week celebration walk of my own after work - around Lake Merritt. The construction is pretty massive, but I'm looking forward to being able to get up close to the water again. Three day weekend!!

strugglin

2009-03-24T21:58:00.000-07:00

Today started with another first-thing phone chat with Carolina, house phone to house phone. I'm lucky to have friends who are thoughtful and smart and humble.

Next, an email from David that made me simultaneously fired up and heart-full and weepy. I'm lucky to have friends who are honest and reach out and take big risks (and encourage me to, too).

At work, I made some big strides at one of my elementary schools and felt really proud when the Principal trusted his own (new) wisdom about how to engage his school community in an effective way. I'm lucky to have a job where I get to feel peoples' hard work for kids and be a strategic thinker and laugh really really hard.

At the next school, I helped my 8th grade history teacher reformat something in Excel and earned an invitation to his retirement party. Another man, who had screamed at me and other staff members two weeks ago shook my hand hello and I almost fainted from surprise (no head lacerations!). I'm lucky to have a job where I can represent positive change in a notoriously frustrating system and support people who fight every day to make sure Oakland kids know there is more to life than murder.

I came back to my office to a flower arrangement from a Principal I helped yesterday. I'm lucky to have a job where I can help people look good and get some acknowledgment in return.

Jess called and we caught up on the whereabouts of the Korean taco truck and using the ten commandments to modify the behavior of elementary school students (aaah!). I'm lucky to have friends who can make me laugh and make my stomach grumble.

Josh and Sara and David made me feel better on the internet. I'm lucky to have friends with quick access to really really cute kids.

My next door neighbors (ages 5 and 6) were playing on my front steps and teaching each other important life lessons about getting angry and protecting your stuff from the urban miners in the neighborhood. I'm lucky to have a house, especially one in the middle of this Magnolia family.

I did more sit-ups than I usually do at the gym. This had nothing to do with luck.

I'm probably forgetting a bunch of things. Not bad for a day that I was pretty sure was going to make me lose it.

preparing

2009-03-15T21:58:00.000-07:00

i'm looking forward to spring break. thanks, target.

drinks

2009-03-13T23:46:00.000-07:00

Long week. Jeannie martini at Z Cafe helps. Continuing in my effort to put black pepper in all of my drinks.

sneaky squirrel

2009-03-10T20:36:00.000-07:00

Venice has a sneaky squirrel too.

i don't hate LA

2009-03-09T22:46:00.001-07:00

So it's winter, but you wouldn't know it from the weather in Venice. I had a great weekend with my buddies in the southland, almost enough to keep me floating through another crazy day at work. Next time I need korean taco truck, canals, bikes, pinkberry, big laughs, iphone navigation, beach sandwiches, and a vigorous milk scrub, I'll be hopping in my car and using my 3/4 tank of gas for good.

Only thing missing was a hug from my macalester-twin - Shana, I'm comin' back!

sweetness

2009-03-03T22:49:00.001-08:00

Like many parts of my life right now, this little jar is simultaneously my tiny pleasure and a frustrating pain. I saw it on the shelf and got excited - who doesn't love honeycomb? My mom had two honeycomb candles that I always loved to smell... what a treat to have that smell IN my honey! What it doesn't say on that cute little label is that honeycomb is essentially wax, but in tiny flakey form held together by the sticky honey. Don't try to take a chunk of honeycomb and put it in your tea. You'll end up with a nice layer of white wax over the surface, making it a little difficult to get to the perfect honey-y goodness underneath.

It's been a week of trying to dig through the wax surface to get to the perfect honey-y goodness. The sweetness is slowly showing itself, but not without a lot of prodding and coaxing. Each little waxy flake is a reminder that there will be rough spots in this life and all of them count for something.

That was hella new age. Eh.

cohabitating together

2009-02-25T19:26:00.000-08:00

I just got a phone call from a telemarketer. I usually don't engage, but she said my name properly so I decided to give her a chance. She proceeded to tell me about being eligible for a free vacation anywhere in the United States (including Hawai'i!). So exciting!

Then she asked me if I was married or in a cohabitational relationship. When I answered, she said she regretted to inform me that I was not eligible because only people who are married or cohabitating together are eligible.

Why do I feel like I just involuntarily participated in a survey about my relationship status? I'm laughing about it anyway.

victory

2009-02-24T22:31:00.000-08:00

I didn't cry at the Montera SSC meeting tonight - and they voted to accept everything I asked them too. Win.

6th graders

2009-02-23T22:53:00.000-08:00

Okay, so sometimes I really need to find the joy in my job. Usually sixth graders do the trick.

At Westlake, a sixth grader walked in on the Principal and I watching a guy casing the school on the security cameras. She said "Hey, are you watching TV? What show is that? It looks like my school! Hey! It IS my school! How did you do that? Can I be on TV?"

At Melrose Leadership, I got there just in time for the sixth grade awards assembly. After watching many of his classmates receive awards for high achievement in math, humanities, and college prep, one sixth grader passed by the Principal and I and suggested that "There should be an award for coming to school on time every day!" Almost, little buddy, but not quite.

My job is kind of fantastic.

the good news

2009-02-20T23:59:00.000-08:00

Lee Scratch Perry is still out of his damn mind. Also, apparently, kabballah.

Julian and Stephen Marley are my fourth and fifth Marleys to see live on stage, they took the honor very well. And the new Fox theater is gorgeous and impressive - right down to the air conditioning being shot up from floor vents. I only had to shake my finger at one overly aggressive baldhead.

That's the good news.

small wonder

2009-02-19T18:38:00.000-08:00

I got home from work before dark tonight.

whatever happened to bolt?

2009-02-18T21:49:00.000-08:00

I found myself clapping and yelling on the treadmill tonight and I'm pretty sure it wasn't the 2.5 mile accomplishment. There is something very special about tall men running across a shiny hardwood floor that brings out the cheer in me way more than any budget training or consultant contract packet could. Even more than vegetable day.

It's been a tough game for my hometown tall men tonight (not over yet!!) and I'm proud of them all but the baby of the bunch gets the honors from me. Last time I checked, he couldn't drink legally, and he's about one cheeseburger over 200 pounds. Tonight he made Kobe fall on top of him and kept his head up through bad foul calls and messy hustles. And he loves his mom. Winner!

work

2009-02-17T23:08:00.001-08:00

I usually try my best to not post about work stuff here. I talk about it enough in real life. But tonight, I finished about three months worth of catching up on an important part of my new job - updating the OUSD Site Deliverables Dashboard. Thankfully most of you have no idea what that is, and I sincerely hope it remains that way. However, I am extremely proud of myself for collecting the data, populating the cells, deciding on thresholds, and communicating the information to people who will hopefully read it and use it. Go me!

stuff on the walls

2009-02-16T23:12:00.001-08:00

When I moved into the garage in high school, I had acres of wall-space to fill with stickers and labels and magazine cut-outs and photos and baseball caps. In college, I took pieces of my real estate with me, along with a huge ball of blue fun-tac. The notes and inspirational phrases mixed in with movie and concert tickets, an enormous Matt Damon face, and photos of drunken nights and new friends.

When I said goodbye to my last roommate here on Magnolia, I decided that everything on my walls would be framed. With a few precious exceptions, my current wall space is a black-framed, almost-a-grown-up collection of museum exhibit posters, drawings, and enlarged photos from my almost-a-grown-up international travels.

Today, that real estate got another piece - thanks to my bacon-loving compadres - a reminder of my love for the irresistible pork belly and its ability to transform everything from figs to scallops to a joyful bite. I'm hanging it near the menorah, cause that's funny.

angry cupcakes

2009-02-15T16:21:00.000-08:00

that pretty much sums up valentine's day 2009.

a few things

2009-02-12T23:23:00.000-08:00

The past few days have been full of budgets and planning and bad attitudes and rain. I've enjoyed most of it. I had at least four reminders of why I love my job (wait, his name is really Don'tell?) and been much better about not second guessing my instincts outside of work. I also ran just over 2 miles on the treadmill (thanks Top Chef) and burned almost 400 calories. That is half of a really good cheeseburger, for reference. Also, the best raspberry mojito I've ever had. Next time I will bring my own pears.

not over yet

2009-02-10T15:09:00.000-08:00

Work hazzard.

Being prepared for anything.

special

2009-02-09T23:11:00.000-08:00

I wore a cute dress today. It helped a little.

full force

2009-02-08T21:02:00.000-08:00

So when your phone rings at 7:30am, your first thought is never "something blog-worthy is probably going to happen." But when it's your neighbor calling to tell you that she (and her amazing puppy) are coming up the back steps with a special treat, the tide turns a little bit. And then, when the special treat turns out to be freshly-squeezed orange juice from your backyard orange tree, it's pretty solidly the winner for the day.

Here's the problem with this blog: I have an interest in being right all the time (I said it!), so it's hard for me to risk posting about something great before the very end of the day. What if something even more inspiring or comforting or exciting happens and I've already posted? Then it's midnight after a long day of doing three peoples' jobs and I have no interest in being creative or remembering anything at all. So days go by. Luckily, I usually remember to document the good stuff and I've been noticing the little good things more and more, so there is no dearth of blog-worthy material. It's more about the choosing.

Since I last got it together to post, work has taken over my life in a serious way. I didn't need any help in getting more focused on work work work, but being responsible for the duties that three people were doing just a few months ago has completely exhausted me. Did I mention we had to move our office in the middle of all of this? No, I didn't, because this is supposed to be about good stuff. I'll just say this is a before and after:

Outside of work, there was a trip to the farmer's market where Abel and I thought too long and missed out on pork knuckles, but I ended up biking home with a crab in my backpack.

Inspired by my industrious college buddy Sarah McColl, I attempted her $8 salmon cakes - with some Terra Firma salad and roasted veggies - and was pleased with the result, especially with the fig mustard on top.

And, as usual, my high points often involved planned and unplanned adventures with my local folks - a great play with Jenn Brown (and deb! hi deb!), a new night at Kitty's with Marty and Kasha, a day at the zoo with Isaiah and Julie, fried apple rings and cajeta and my first Cal men's basketball game with Abel, parking lot laughs with Liz and Marina, little contributions to celebrating great people with the Agape Peace Prize crew, and 4-year-old birthday fun (cuetes and cake!) with Carolina and the Camacho-Diamonds.

I've got it pretty good.

problem solving!

2009-01-29T22:11:00.000-08:00

Thanks Kasha's mom for helping solve the age-old problems of life in an uninsulated house. The sage green, I'm pleased to report, is very soothing, and it is versatile for men AND women. Also, the booklight is very powerful.

This narrowly beat out Seph's 10 year mistaken identity clarity. Seph is still my favorite version of Rob Lowe. Marty added Colin Farrell. What do you think?

quiet

2009-01-26T22:53:00.000-08:00

Today was a day of stretching. Professionally, the moments of sitting still and not jumping into the conversation every two seconds were huge. The quiet space of our new office is going to challenge me to do my job well and in a new way. Personally, I'm learning that when I let things go, they do their best to return and test my strength. And my quest to a solid set of 10 push-ups is coming along so nicely that I'm pretty sure that my physical strength just might catch up to my emotional strength sometime in this decade. Hallelujah!

out on a storm

2009-01-24T23:20:00.001-08:00

15 years ago, early early this morning, my mom climbed up into my bed with 12-year-old me and didn't have to say anything. There was a big storm that night and my dad, who had been in a scary hepatic coma in my parents' bedroom for many days, took off in a mix of thunder and clouds and downpour. I think last year was the first time I thought about him without crying, but I'm pretty sure that was just a passing phase.

I'm grateful for the opportunity to live on in the legacy he and my mom created in West Oakland and in the world. I will remember his laughter, his ability to strike fear in kids and adults by furrowing his brow, his salt-and-pepper "skunk" beard, his car dancing, his playfulness, his patience and impatience, his bike and roller skates, his love of technology and community, his hairy arms, his wisdom, and his tenacity even in the face of failure.

I know his spirit lives on in me and I'm hopeful every day for the strength to carry it on.

squash water

2009-01-23T21:04:00.001-08:00

Once again, the farm box brings the joy, this time in the form of butternut squash soup with melted leeks. Kasha's barn-living knowledge yielded a little genius from the start - did you know that you can roast your butternut squash in a little pool of water and it won't ruin your baking dish? winner. The leeks were curvy on the inside and then sliced up into lovely little half-circles.

Melting leeks is kind of a challenging process, especially if you don't know what you're going for before you start. We ended up with curly leek crackers, essentially. But they were really fun to play with. Add in a little pecorino romano, a mixture of all of the mustards left in the fridge, and some meyer lemon, and your squash water becomes a creamy delicious soup. Just the comfort for a crappy day at work or on the couch. For reals.

elliptical etc.

2009-01-21T22:56:00.000-08:00

I love my gym. Despite the head injury I sustained there last summer, I continue to make my way to the treadmill, elliptical, weight machines, outdoor pool, and stretching area on the regular. It used to be that my main incentive for going was to watch my favorite shows on the tiny televisions attached to the machines. Something about an hour of Tyra Banks smiling with her eyes really made me push myself to go the extra quarter mile or to run instead of walk.

In Achieving Service Excellence, we talk about creating school district "customers" (aka families and employees) who become ambassadors for us. We appreciate the people who continue to come back to us, but we really want to do everything we can to make people encourage their families and friends to join them in being OUSD customers. I can't say that there's anyone who has sustained a head injury that has been an ambassador for OUSD. I'm that for my gym. Crazy.

In addition to losing about 25 pounds courtesy, in part, of my hard work with the machines, I feel stronger, have much better stamina, and built up my ability to be disciplined and follow through with goals I set for myself. Woohoo!

thanks rev.

2009-01-20T14:06:00.001-08:00

I like to be dazzled by political shows. Today was full of ceremony, that's for sure. I'm still holding my breath, though.

For now, I share in this plea to G-d, and anyone else who cares to answer the call:

"We ask you to help us work for that day when black will not be asked to get in back, when brown can stick around. When yellow will be mellow, when the red man can get ahead, man; and when white will embrace what is right."

skinny white guys

2009-01-19T21:58:00.000-08:00

So I missed a few days... moving on.

Honestly, no one tells a story like a skinny white guy. Bonus points if he's on a bike with a spraycan (or twelve in a milk crate strapped to the handlebars). Tonight was about birthdays (no one said birthdays), zebras (no one said zebras), a chupacabra (yes, maybe it was on a t-shirt), animal hats, and squirrel-fu. I'm still laughing.

crafty

2009-01-15T23:59:00.000-08:00

okay okay, so i brought lanyard to kasha's crafternoon. it wasn't a quilt or socks or beaded earrings or a graf pumpkin, but i worked on it until i got hella bored. then i started getting amazing ideas. no leaks yet, but let's just say that you should stay tuned for my GENIUS food plans. there might be giant pelicans involved.

Oakland/Fallujah

2009-01-14T23:23:00.000-08:00

This is the view from my front porch. That's the moon. Those are also big sky streaks. Maybe they are clouds of teargas. Maybe they are clouds of smoke. Those little squiggles are helicoptors. Right now, there are only 4 different ones I can see, but I think there are more up there. Pretty desolate.

Through the clouds, to the right of my front porch, if you squint really hard, in spite of the night lights and noisy distractions, you can see the stars. It's a stretch, but I'm trying.

buddies

2009-01-13T21:40:00.000-08:00

I'm lucky to have lots of reasons to laugh my way through my crazy days - middle school student commentary, pop music, blogs, funny text messages - especially when the big picture is doing its best to hang a frowny cloud over the Town and the world.

Today, I realized that it takes a special friend to reduce me to giggles without a word. And for that (plus ice cream!), I'm lucky AND grateful.

closure

2009-01-12T21:28:00.000-08:00

Part of why I started this blog was to have an outlet for some of my end-of-2008 grief and heartache. That's been working out well. I'm prioritizing my own happiness, which is a big deal, especially since a lot of 2008 (and let's be honest, most of my life) has been about caregiving for other people and prioritizing other people's needs. I'm not going to pretend that looking out for my folks isn't a huge part of who I am anymore, or that I've magically started ignoring phone calls and neglecting my work, but I'm actively thinking about my needs in the mix these days. I'm not sure if anyone else has noticed, but I have.

In that vein, I'm realizing that there are some things and some people that I unintentionally left behind in 2008, and now that I've noticed that, it's intentional. Thanks, calendar, for the commonly accepted hav'dallah (separation). Good luck in whatever you're doing, people who didn't make it to 2009 with me.

Maybe that doesn't sound like a pick-me-up. But for real, I feel a thousand pounds lighter.

all around winner

2009-01-11T21:53:00.000-08:00

Two miles on the treadmill, plus no fainting in the shower at the gym. WIN.
Otaez chilaquiles verdes for breakfast. WIN.
Started all of my work to-dos for the weekend. WIN.
Made my first bet at the racetrack. WIN. (like really, we won $5.80 on that bet)
Dollar beers. WIN. WIN.
Picante super nachos, plus the Saturday crossword puzzle. WIN.
Buddy time with Chels Malone. WIN.
Warriors v. Pacers. WIN. (like really, 120-117)
In bed before 10p on a school night. WIN.

Can't tell me nuthin.

racoons and creepy jerks

2009-01-10T22:02:00.000-08:00

I like a good story. Even when my idea of a good story was a Baby-sitters' Club book (Logan Bruno, where are you?), I could usually be found with my head in a book, or eavesdropping on my parents and their friends talk about the old days, or making up something close enough to truth that my friends would probably believe it.

When I worked at The Freedom Archives, so much of my work was about connecting stories of struggle and resistance to the stories we were living in that moment. The idea that we could learn directly from someone else's stories and use that wisdom to change the stories our decendents will tell about us is what made me feel so solid in that work.

I get into trouble sometimes because I sense connections between other peoples' stories and my own - except the connections are sometimes stronger in my mind than they end up being on my lips. One of my goals for myself, especially given my recent vocabulary challenges, is to get tighter on my stories and connections, if nothing more than to make it easier on the loved ones who are listening.

Today I heard a lot of good stories - Spanish-speaking pitbulls, strawberry-blonde raccoons, BART-starers, 90s Detroit TV commercials, and Hawaiian mold. I'm sure I'll find myself repeating them sometime soon, vaguely connected to someone else's story. But that's what keeps us connected, reminded that we're not running solo out there, and there's always something to laugh about.

This rambling message is brought to you by 3:14am, cerveza Sol, and accidental late-afternoon naps. Word.

glimmer flicker

2009-01-09T23:21:00.000-08:00

Listen to the story

enough said...

you like it i love it

2009-01-08T23:55:00.000-08:00

There's an owl on your clock.

I have the pleasure of working with some incredible people who get up every morning to serve Oakland youth. I often say that you'd have to be crazy to be one of those people, but the truth is that they are living on a roller coaster made up of the roller coasters of all of the students they work for. And most of them avoid nausea.

I've been in this work for almost two years now, and I've seen a lot of things in Principals' offices. Some bad adult behavior, some amusing kid logic, some good ideas, some terrifying circumstances - enough to write a book of non-fiction that would get us all accused of lying. Needless to say, very little surprises me anymore.

And then I happened to glance over at this, on the wall at one of my elementary schools. When I asked the Principal what it was doing there, he said (as I've heard him say about many people) "I like it!"

Whatever gets you through the day...

tall like a tree

2009-01-07T20:29:00.000-08:00

today was rough, so what better than to share the air with my favorite tall men in the town? unfortunately the tall men from socal beat us in points, but i'm pretty sure we won in style.

just a little note: i'm deliberately not talking about the state of the world and my city here. my insides are on fire with disappointment and rage, while my training as an organizer, politico, policyhead, and fighter is working around the clock to act for change in this soul-trying time. my promise to myself is to not shut down in the face of it all, and to keep the glimmer of love, hope, justice, patience, and laughter alive enough to return to full force someday soon. ask me how i'm doing.

secrets

2009-01-06T22:24:00.000-08:00

i know a lot of stuff. and i'm not tellin'! today's secrets made me laugh harder than ever. thanks job and life!

little family

2009-01-05T21:40:00.000-08:00

Fania and Mom, 2009.

My parents always told me that I inspired them to work harder, be better people, and set a good example. I'm lucky to have a mother who continues to be an inspiration to me, and to many others in Oakland. Sometimes it's been hard to share her with 20,000 or so constituents, but I'm grateful to have a role model so easily accessible.

Today, my mom was inaugurated for her fourth term as the City Councilwoman for Oakland's third district. Today, my mom stood up in front of her colleagues and our community and implored them to work hard, be better people, and set a good example for all of us. Today, my pride in my family and our impact on Oakland and the people of Oakland swelled a little more. And today, as genocide and injustice plague so many people in the town and around the world, my faith in our ability to counter that with love, wisdom, and community multiplied again.

near-sloth

2009-01-04T23:32:00.000-08:00

So it's the last day of winter break. I've heard all kinds of "can't we have one more day?" and "oh no, early mornings begin again". I have no sympathy. In fact, I'm really glad school and work start back up tomorrow - these past two weeks have been close to deathly boring with everyone else on vacation. I'm excited for my work email inbox and my voicemail to be active again. Excited for budget transfers that get processed and people that get hired and facilities work orders that get closed.

Since the last kids left campus on December 19th, with their caring adults chasing them out the door, I've had lots of quiet time. As most of you know, my work takes over a lot of my brain, so I had a unique challenge when I was actually able to finish working at work and go home to my own life. In between fun concerts and sports events, delicious drinks and lots of cooking, I found some gaps where work would have normally fit in. Enter technology.

I've been an on-again-off-again Netflix user for years - since before I had an actual DVD player. Sometime in the past few months, Netflix has created a Watch Instantly feature where movies from the general catalog are available for web-streaming. At first, I amused myself with episode after episode of NewsRadio and Charles in Charge on the weekends. But winter break has opened up the genres of Stand-Up Comedies, Mockumentaries, and Indie Drama to my consciousness. Thank goodness.

too many to choose!

2009-01-03T23:03:00.000-08:00

treadmill time with jennbrown, surprise homemade tamales on my doorstep from cassie and hugo, combative grocery shopping and very creative pizza-making with chels malone... nice to have too many things that make me happy in one day to choose from. let's go oakland!

ebony and i-vo-ry

2009-01-02T19:28:00.000-08:00

My mom's house has a huge, black upright piano in what is now the dining room. She got it when she was young and funny in Petaluma, living with a bird dog next to a chicken farm. When I was a baby, my dad would play "Hit the Road, Jack" and I would stop crying and giggle. I remember learning to play with the pedals, and across the high F that didn't sound, and peeking under the music stand at the hammers and harp as I pressed random keys. I remember the night when I came home to a real piano bench - no more metal step-stool - and filling it with my Grandma's sheet music. I never took lessons, but taught myself to play, in spite of its tunelessness and dust.

Both of my grandmothers' houses had pianos - Grandma Florence's spotless grand and Grandma Hayes' crowded with baby pictures and Methodist hymnals - and somehow it's just what makes a home a home to me. So, for my 25th birthday, my mom gave me a piano. Nothing like my grandmothers', but just right for me.

Now, after countless choir rehearsals, sectionals, funk band practices, Sirens practices, crazy-electronic-music-lady sessions, I don't have a lot to show for my career as a musician. Dusty practice rooms and makeshift sound closets come right back when I sit down at my own little keyboard and plunk out old choir music or classics from my book of torch songs. And there isn't much more comforting than that.

cliche: dance like no one's watching

2009-01-01T21:02:00.000-08:00

There was a time when I was terrified to dance in front of anyone. I missed many an after-school wall-clinging, at least one grinding 8th grade dinner dance, and several semi-formal "balls" before I silenced the self-critical voices in my head and got with the program.

These days, you might find me sitting on the sub-woofer at Kitty's before you'll find me in the craziness Marty and Matthew create on Saturdays, but that doesn't mean the voices are back. Honestly, it probably means that my feet hurt a little in the tall shoes, and it's much more fun to drink wine from an enormous glass than to shake it with the best of them out there.

But put me in my sweats and fuzzy socks and bump some girlie music on my little speakers in the living room, and I couldn't care less whose eyes are on me. The trick about dancing like no one's watching is to remember that it's much more fun to imagine that they are. Bonus points for stuntin' in the mirror.